No, I Don't Appreciate It.

No, I Don't Appreciate It.

I feel like as a girl, catcalling comes to be something you just accept and deal with and honestly when I think about it it really irritates me.
I can’t count the amount of times I’ve experienced some sort of street objectification: from being beeped at as a car drives past me to having “compliments” at me on the street.  Last week, a guy went as far as to walk closer to me as I stood at the bus stop and whisper “Yeah you look good today” as he walked past.  Nowadays I’m so used to it that I just brush it off and carry on with my life, but why has cat-calling been normalised to the point where it’s something girls just come to expect?  
I shouldn’t have to be worried about wearing a skirt or shorts in boiling hot weather, because of what random strangers that walk/drive past me might think.  I’m a young girl who has been warned all her life about rape and kidnapping so beeping at me and yelling slurs as I’m standing alone on a street is not going to make me want you at all, it’s gonna make me do the complete opposite.
I just don’t understand the intent behind it… if you’re driving past me, beeping at me in your car do you expect me to run after you and confess my love for you?  I can’t speak for all women, but I don’t see it as a compliment, I see it as you making me uncomfortable, and at the end of the day it’s a form of harassment and it’s not okay.  Do you think you’re flattering me?  You’re not.  Stop it.  Seriously.
Next time you feel like yelling at a girl or showing your interest as your drive past, keep it to yourself.  If you truly think that this complete stranger walking past you may be the love of your life, write her a love letter, pine after her from afar, preach to your friends about her intense beauty… but don’t cat-call, it’s tacky and I guarantee you it won’t work in your favour.
What are your thoughts on catcalling?  Got any reasons as to why people do it, or want to share your own personal experience?  I would love to hear it in the comments!
Lots of love,
Jas xx
 
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22 Comments

  1. April 24, 2017 / 11:03 am

    Hey! Very good and deep post! I never got cat-called so i never thought about it actually,but i thinkt this thing should be stopped, because as you said that they’re are not going to make us run after them
    That’s my thoughts xx

  2. April 24, 2017 / 11:48 am

    This is something I’ve been too scared to talk about, I’m glad someone else relates!
    Elisse xo

    • April 24, 2017 / 11:50 am

      I think it’s a thing lots of people are scared to talk about (me too in the past) but we shouldn’t be scared, we shouldn’t be subject to it in the first place! Hope this helps you talk about it in the future.
      Jas xx

  3. April 24, 2017 / 2:05 pm

    I hate it. Happens all the time and makes me so uncomfortable sometimes to go anywhere. And then if you dismiss their compliments or don’t want to give your number, you’re called a bitch, or not that cute anyway. Smh then why you trying to get my attention risking a car accident. One time me and my cousin was walking at night when it happened, the guys went as far as yelling out the window to ask which of us has the bigger ass…wow.

    • April 24, 2017 / 2:39 pm

      It’s honestly so ridiculous! And when it happens it makes me sick to my stomach. Not wanting to acknowledge someone yelling at you on the Street is not a bad thing and does not make us “bitches” I just don’t understand.
      Jas xx

  4. April 24, 2017 / 4:06 pm

    I have never understood cat-calling. Not only does it, understandably, make you and other women feel uncomfortable, it really portrays the rest of us men in a really bad light. Most cat-callers are probably insecure, trying to make themselves feel better by triggering some sort of response from a woman. No matter how they try to justify it, it serves no purpose but for them to make themselves feel better at the sake of someone else.

    • April 24, 2017 / 8:23 pm

      I agree with everything you said, I’ve never understood it either, and even though it’s not representative of all men at all, it makes me feel uncomfortable every time I walk past a man on the street because I don’t know whether they’ll say things or not. Thanks for offering your opinions!
      Jas xx

      • April 25, 2017 / 10:10 am

        And that’s exactly why it paints us in a bad light… It just makes the community more nervy because of some inconsiderate actions. Can’t stand it. Why can’t everyone just be nice to everyone? Maybe some day, ay? 😀

  5. April 24, 2017 / 8:00 pm

    This is such a well written and thought out post Jas, and I definitely agree. I know some people see cat-calling as harmless or complimentary, but I know to a lot of people it can be incredibly unnerving, anxiety inducing and upsetting, and as you mentioned, simply walking down the street shouldn’t warrant suggestive calls from other people, no matter the circumstances or what you’re wearing. It baffles me that it still goes on today, and that it happens so often too, so writing and sharing posts like these is a great way to get the discussion going and to re-enforce the notion it’s not OK. – Tasha

    • April 24, 2017 / 8:24 pm

      Thank you for the lovely comment Tasha! I don’t understand why it still goes on today either!
      Jas xx

      • April 24, 2017 / 8:27 pm

        It’s crazy isn’t it? Hopefully it will end someday, I think posts like these do help with that! 🙂

  6. April 30, 2017 / 3:57 pm

    Whole heartedly agree with this. I’ve put up with so much shit over the years from comments shouted at by men to being flashed at to being harassed on the tube to men actually grabbing me. Its disrespectful, repulsive, disturbing and a form of abuse. I’d love the day to come when women can truly relax and feel safe on the streets.

    • April 30, 2017 / 4:22 pm

      Sorry you’ve had to experience this. It’s really upsetting and I also long for a day when woman can properly relax on the streets!
      Jas xx

      • josypheen
        May 1, 2017 / 8:19 am

        YES! I agree with this completely!
        Have you ever read the book everyday sexism? I with I had read it when I was younger so I would have more courage to speak up about things like cat-calling/ being groped or being harassed at work.

        • May 1, 2017 / 1:24 pm

          No I haven’t but I’m looking for new books so may add it to the list, thank you!
          Jas xx

          • josypheen
            May 1, 2017 / 1:37 pm

            It is not the easiest read (it might make you mad at the world) but it is great for making you realise you’re not alone!

  7. I know exactly what you mean. My experience with catcalling is relatively non existent in the UK coz in more than 2 years living here, it might have happened a really few time. But back in france and italy, it was awful! I felt like an object or a dog… xx corinne

  8. July 5, 2017 / 3:49 pm

    Yes girl! this is amazing! completely agree <3

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