Sometimes we have no idea what direction our life is going to take us, and let it carry us away before we’ve even registered that our lives are changing… I feel like that’s happened with me and my blog; I started it because I needed a creative outlet, and now here I am 1 year and 3 months later, living a life that I never thought would be mine.
That sounds incredibly dramatic… and it’s not like I’m living a dramatically different life to the life I was a year ago, but for me, the changes seem enormous. I regularly attend events… That I’m invited to… Me! A whole little nobody who started an internet diary! I actually spend time curating images, regularly posting and scheduling social media uploads, I interact with people on the internet that I’ve never met and I put myself out for opportunities that I never would have done before… I’m still me; I’m still the shy, awkward girl that doesn’t quite know what she’s doing with her life, except now I contain a confidence that didn’t exist within me before.
My life is moving faster than I anticipated it would, and so I want to keep track of it all. Last year I had my Project 2017 series, documenting my mood and personal growth throughout the year, and I kind of have a similar thing going with my How’s Life series, but I want to do a roundup at the end of each month, documenting everything that’s been going on. There are a couple reasons for this; part of me just wants to keep track of it all, and allow myself to remember what I’ve done, and part of me has been incredibly spaced out… I haven’t exactly been immersed in the moment, so this would allow me recall it all. I’ll also be able to look to the month ahead, clear some space in my brain, and have it all laid out in front of me.
I’d probably describe March as the month of the confusion bubble, as for a lot of it I was floating around, not quite doing anything but also never having free time. I travelled between Bristol and London more times than I’d care to mention (Let’s just say that I’m single-handedly funding National Express at the moment…), had a snow day trapped inside with my flatmates, and barely attended University.
The UCU strike impacted my course drastically, and I essentially went 4 weeks without University lessons (I sure do love getting my £9000 worth…), so it threw everything in my brain out of whack. I’m a person that really relies on routine and consistency, especially when it comes to my education, so now I honestly don’t know what the end of this year will hold… I’m trying as hard as I can on my own, but if I could succeed without my seminars and lectures then I wouldn’t have gone to University in the first place. It’s all quite frustrating when it’s completely out of your hands, but at the same time, that means that there’s nothing I can do to change the situation, so I just have to go with it.
As for the travel? Well, March has been packed with birthdays, events and work, which has lead to me bouncing back and forth between London and Bristol. I live on coaches now; I’ve probably spent more time on them than I have in seminars this term, and honestly, now that I’m back for Easter I’m just happy to be in one place for the time being. I feel like I need some grounding, and some time to just… relax, because even when I had no lessons, my blog and internship seemed to keep me busy enough as it was.
Everything has been quite… distanced; like I’ve been floating outside of my body, watching myself live my life, and I don’t quite know how to turn it off. I feel like maybe my brain needs to re-calibrate for a while, but unfortunately I don’t have time to do that until deadlines are met and exams are done. Things will keep moving forward… and I’ll be pushed along with them, but I need to remember to take time to enjoy things for myself. That’s what I aim to work towards this April. Wish me luck!
How’s your March been? Let me know in the comments!
Lots of love,
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Hey, I'm Jasmine Burke. A girl in her twenties fresh out of Uni that's trying to write in any way that she can. I go under the branch of "lifestyle" but honestly, you can find pretty much anything on here.
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