10 Things I’ve Learnt in my Twentieth Year

10 Things I’ve Learnt in my Twentieth Year

As you (probably don’t) know, in 3 days time I say goodbye to being 20.  I’m not usually a big birthday person, in fact I’ve hated most of them, but this year I’m making the effort.  I liked being 20, I have great people in my life, and I do want to celebrate another year of it.  So, to honour that, all my posts this week will be somewhat birthday related.  Starting with another one of my 10 things posts, this time with a birthday theme!  Welcome to 10 things I learnt in my twentieth year.

Background: What’s 20 Been Like?

My twentieth year of life was a pretty great one, with more happening than I intended to.  Honestly, I can testify that I grew a lot as a person, and I learnt more than I expected to.  It was the year my blog went a bit crazy, I went to the USA for the first time and I all round became a more self-assured version of me.

I’ve had a lot of ups and I’ve had a lot of downs.  But overall, I’d give it a 10/10 for a solid year, I just hope my 21st can live up to it.

10 Things I Learnt…

1) I look better in colourful clothing than I thought.

I wrote about me embarking on a colourful clothing journey a while ago, and it sounds frivolous, but it meant a lot to me.  As mentioned in the post, I spent a lot of years dressing in only black in an attempt to blend in as much as possible.  Now I’m (slightly) more risky with my clothing choices, steer straight into colourful choices, and look and feel better than ever.  I’m slowly leaning into a sense of style.  It will probably still take some time, but I’m getting there.

2) It’s okay to like being in front of the camera.

If you look at my blog Instagram a year ago vs now, it is drastically different.  I barely featured on it before: if I did, it would be the occasional selfie.  Now, it’s me, me and more me, in posed photos.  I never used to pose for photos by myself!  The more I got into outfit posts/photography in general, the more confident I came in front of a camera.  I’ll happily pose for pictures in the street now.  That was completely unheard of for me before.

3) Who I am.

I’ve spent a lot of my life focusing on where I fit in, rather than me, myself, and I.  I think once I accepted that I’m never going to look perfect, and I’m never going to be that big and amazing, the pressure was gone and I started focusing on me.  I definitely focus on being the best version of myself more than anything else anymore, and it’s so refreshing.

4) Surprisingly, if you stop cutting your hair, it will grow.

STOP CUTTING YOUR HAIR WHEN YOU’RE BORED JASMINE.  YOU WANT IT LONGER JASMINE.  DON’T ACT ON YOUR IMPULSES JASMINE.

5) I work more than I think.

Back in November I was working my way through an application for an extra-curricular achievement award, and freaking out.  You needed to register 50 hours of extra-curricular things you’d done in the last year and I hadn’t done much.  I sat there for ages wondering why I was always busy and yet, appeared to be doing nothing.  However, then I realised that I haven’t been doing nothing.  I’ve poured my heart and soul into this blog.  I spend 5 hours on my blog on a bad day, and that’s only doing the admin stuff.  I work through the night during Uni so it doesn’t interfere with work.  So much of my life is spent working on my blog, and it’s taken me so long to realise that.

6) Go out and get what you want.

This is probably the first year that I’ve really committed to being a “Yes” person.  I’ve said yes to events outside of my comfort zones, chased up opportunities that I knew I wanted, and made myself happier in the process.  I’ve learnt in this year more than any other that you really have to go after what you want in life, and in this last year, it has worked out insanely well for me.

It’s weird, because essentially all this brand work and events started from me plucking up the courage to one particular thing, and from there it’s been a snowball effect.  I’m going to do a post on the event that, I believe, made this all kick off for me soon (It’s already written and scheduled), stay tuned.

7) I am actually good at some things?

Following on from the last one, chasing after opportunities has made me realise that I do have some merit.  I find it hard to believe in myself, and with my blog being something that I did for myself, I don’t really get that validation and reassurance.  I’d convinced myself that I wasn’t really all that.  However, I got my internship at the Guardian, and have had brands choose to work with me over other people.  It’s slowly convincing me that I have a right to believe in myself.

8) The right people can make all the difference.

I’m such a people pleaser, and will stick it out until the end at risk of hurting the other person.  However, this year I’ve made a conscious effort to only focus on those who I deem the “right” people.  I have an amazing group of friends, a beautifully supporting family, and a pretty cool boyfriend, who have all made my life a lot smoother this last year.

9) It can’t hurt to smile.

I think that I’ve mentioned on here before that I hate smiling.  I think it’s to do with my teeth, or the fact that I’d had it drummed into me that pouting is the only form of sexy.  However, in this last year I’ve come to love my smile.  It may not be the straightest or the whitest or make me the sexiest girl in the world, but it’s a great representation of me and what I stand for.  I’d take that over everything else any day.

10) Not everyone you’re close to will support you, but why should you care?

Over time, the better the opportunities get and the more I talk to people I’m close to about them (Despite how uncomfortable it makes me), I’ve started to notice who supports me and who doesn’t.  Don’t get me wrong, I don’t expect anybody to read every post I write, comment on everything, like every photo or share what I do.  I do a lot of things, and I really don’t expect massive levels of support (Although, some of my friends and family are amazing at that).  However, I’m starting to notice the same people never congratulate me, or interact with my success. What surprised me most about this is how little I’ve cared. 

A few years ago, maybe even a year ago, I would have been seething inside, but I’ve noticed how much my attitude has matured.  I understand that some people just don’t support me, and that’s their prerogative.  It allows us to both carry on as normal and not create any toxic energy.

And there you have it!

This was a rather long and rambly recollection of the lessons I learnt in my twentieth year.  For the first time in a long time, I’m actually looking forward to my birthday, and what’s to come as a sparkly new 21 year old.  Thank you for entertaining this post and my blog thus far, and I hope that you enjoy the posts I have planned for the rest of the week!

What’s a lesson that you’ve learnt in the last year?  Let me know in the comments!

Lots of love,

Jas xx

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48 Comments

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 3, 2018 / 11:52 am

      It’s not until Thursday, but thank you! I’m starting to believe that I suit colours too!

      Jas xx

  1. September 3, 2018 / 12:23 pm

    Happy Birthday when it comes!

    Ashley | hiyaitsashley.com

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 3, 2018 / 12:43 pm

      Thank you!

      Jas xx

  2. September 3, 2018 / 1:31 pm

    great post and good read as well!! i just turned twenty so i’m in the same process of learning and growing as you were/are ✨ i hope you have/ had a great birthday!!

    Freddy// sickocean.wordpress.com

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 3, 2018 / 6:57 pm

      Awwww thank you so much! And happy belated birthday!

      Jas xx

  3. September 3, 2018 / 2:27 pm

    An early happy birthday!

    I love these kinds of posts, it’s always intreging to find out what people have learnt. I guess I’ve learnt this last year that people do actually want to spend time with me, as simple as that is. I turn 20 next year, so let’s hope I’ve learnt this much that year.

    All the best for 21!

    Sophie | Sophie’s Spot

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 3, 2018 / 6:59 pm

      Awww I’m glad that you learnt something so positive! And thank you so much <3

      Jas xx

  4. September 3, 2018 / 2:52 pm

    Hope you have a great birthday!!

    P.S. – I’m 39 and still learning the hair-cutting lesson 😂😂😂

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 3, 2018 / 6:59 pm

      Awwww thank you! I feel like haircutting is gonna be something I always relapse into haha

      Jas xx

  5. September 3, 2018 / 4:51 pm

    This is such a lovely post! I think blogging just makes us somehow better at being in front of the camera, it’s so weird. I’m much more inclined to be getting snaps all the time now, just in case of a good instagram opportunity.

    Megan // https://pixieskiesblog.wordpress.com/

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 3, 2018 / 7:00 pm

      Awwww thank you! Yeah, blogging has definitely made me better in front of a camera!

      Jas xx

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 3, 2018 / 7:00 pm

      Awwwwww thank you so much! That actually means so much <3

      Jas xx

  6. September 4, 2018 / 1:26 am

    Happy early birthday girl! I turn 21 in a couple months so I know how it feels, I’m not really a birthday person either. That’s so awesome that you’ve had such a great 20th year and I hope your 21st is even better! I’m the complete opposite with my hair – I let my hair grow for too long and then realize that I hate it and cut like 4 inches off every time 😂

  7. September 4, 2018 / 8:08 pm

    Happy early birthday! These are great things to learn about yourself, especially being more open to opportunities, and taking into account that you do work a lot, your blog does count and I am happy you are getting more brand opportunities that’s amazing Jasmine x

  8. Lisa's Notebook
    September 4, 2018 / 8:51 pm

    Happy early birthday wishes! This was such a lovely post to read, I love that you’re more confident and that you can recognise how hard you work. You have such a beautiful smile, I hope we see more of it and hear more about your future achievements too xx

    Lisa | http://www.lisasnotebook.com

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 4, 2018 / 8:52 pm

      Awwww thank you so much!

      Jas xx

  9. September 4, 2018 / 8:56 pm

    amazing post! xx i hope you have a wonderful birthday. these are such important lessons to learn and i only wish i had learned them at 20 years old! someone of them i still need to learn myself! i hope 21 brings you lots of more life lessons learned and immense happiness xxx lots of love

    mich // simplymich.com

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 4, 2018 / 8:56 pm

      Thank you so much!

      Jas xx

  10. September 4, 2018 / 9:04 pm

    This is a great post Jas! It’s awesome that you have grown in confidence so much, you have such a really lovely smile! That’s really exciting that you are putting yourself out there and getting more brand work. I’m looking forward to reading the post about the event that kicked it all off. Thanks for sharing and hope you have a great birthday! <3 xx

    Bexa | http://www.hellobexa.com

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 4, 2018 / 9:12 pm

      Thank you so much for your detailed comment Bexa <3

      Jas xx

  11. September 4, 2018 / 9:14 pm

    I hope you have a great birthday on Thursday! These are great things to have learned. Xx

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 4, 2018 / 9:19 pm

      Thank you so much!

      Jas xx

  12. September 4, 2018 / 10:46 pm

    This sounds like a great year for growth! These are such amazing things to learn, especially having more confidence. Happy birthday for Thursday, I hope you have an incredible day! x

    Sophie
    http://www.glowsteady.co.uk

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 10, 2018 / 12:17 am

      Thank you so much Sophie!

      Jas xx

  13. September 5, 2018 / 8:59 am

    Really love reading these types of posts! Hope you have an amazing birthday! Getting out of my comfort is definitely something i really want to do as well! xx
    Beaulife.org

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 10, 2018 / 12:17 am

      Thank you so much!

      Jas xx

  14. September 5, 2018 / 9:19 am

    These are all VERY important things to have learnt – especially the point about not cutting your hair. Who’d have thought?! 😉 Very happy birthday for tomorrow! xxx

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 10, 2018 / 12:17 am

      Haha thank you so much Jenny!

      Jas xx

  15. September 5, 2018 / 10:20 am

    I loved that you’ve noticed the lack of support from certain people in your life, but that you’ve been able to acknowledge it but not let it negatively affect you. I need to take a note from your book and start working on that.

    Julia // The Sunday Mode

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 10, 2018 / 12:18 am

      Yeah, I won’t lie, that’s probably the lesson that I’m most proud of!

      Jas xx

  16. September 5, 2018 / 8:09 pm

    that’s amazing how much work you’ve put into your blog, people sometimes forget how much work goes into them behind the scenes, you’re doing so so well gal x

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 9, 2018 / 6:05 pm

      Thank you so much lovely!

      Jas xx

  17. September 5, 2018 / 8:35 pm

    Happy Birthday. What an amazing blog. I’m (nearly!) double your age and not sure I have the level of insight into who I am/what I want to be so you’re destined for great things I’m sure. Xx

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 9, 2018 / 6:30 pm

      Awww thank you so much!

      Jas xx

  18. Deb's Decorative Life
    September 5, 2018 / 11:40 pm

    I loved what you’ve learned by your 20th year. I like how you go out and get what you want and that you know who you are. I also work more than I think I do. I also agree that the right people can make a difference.

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 9, 2018 / 6:34 pm

      I’m so glad you agree, and thanks so much for reading!

      Jas xx

  19. September 6, 2018 / 9:53 am

    Love this post!! I have just turned 20 and now I’m thinking of starting a list like this too!!
    happy birthday btw! :)x

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 9, 2018 / 10:29 pm

      Oooo I’d love to read one if you write it!

      Jas xx

  20. Emma
    September 6, 2018 / 10:15 am

    Happy Birthday Lovely! I loved reading this and seeing how you’ve grown in confidence 🙂

    Emma – http://www.lifeofemmax.co.uk

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 9, 2018 / 10:33 pm

      Awwww thank you so much!

      Jas xx

  21. September 6, 2018 / 11:08 am

    Happy belated birthday, hope you had a lovely day! This was such a lovely post to read xx | lifeofablindgirl.com

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 9, 2018 / 10:48 pm

      Thank you so much!

      Jas xx

  22. September 14, 2018 / 8:57 pm

    Oh my gosh number 10. Number 10 is something that’s been really bugging me since I started blogging. Blogging is honestly one of the best things that has ever happened to me and I feel like I’ve achieved so much and the amount of people I considered friends that haven’t liked my posts or congratulated me or even so much as opened my blog is crazy! I love how positive this post is though and I LOVE that most of it is about how much you’ve grown as a person and started to love yourself more. Can’t wait to see you blossom even more!
    Alice Xx

    • thoughtsfromjasmine
      Author
      September 14, 2018 / 9:31 pm

      Yeah, it used to bug me so much. Like I really wasn’t asking for anything, and I was amazed with some of the support some of my friends were giving me! However, I kept noticing small things, like the same people never saying well done – how hard is that? However, once I forced myself to rise above it, it got far better.

      Jas xx

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